waking up today before 6 30 am was my first time since a year ago.
of course i did not have the motivation to wake up which was something that i once had.
walking+running in the morning is definitely tiring.
seeing many kids playing around, jealousy of their youth was what i had in mind.
i think most grownups will think of going back to days when they were young. the opposite is the same.and i wasn't the exception.
time passes fast..just too fast..
gripping hold of the past is very tiring too..
mentally, physically, emotionally
went to bed immediately after shower
i was too tired
had macs breakfast for lunch
sounds quite ironic
preparing my own tea- 2 packets of sugar and 2 packets of powdered milk+stirring
but i used to prepare two Styrofoam cups of tea in the past
because she always failed to dissolve her sugar fully and the tea of course doesn't taste that nice and in fact became very sweet at the end.
a slight smile when i remembered
but heart sank as well
doing work yet able to steal a glimpse of her from time to time, was a simple happiness that i yearned and hoped to protect.
but i failed terribly.
i lost the fight to "work"
i guess
or all this while i was not even considered
okay back to work.
loads of work.
and i slacked too much yesterday.
this is very bad
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