stubborn me

everyday i open my eyes and i will think of you..
and there goes my mood..

was wondering again how can you seems to treat those memories as nothing..
can you teach me..
i thought i was okay..but it seems i wasn't..
gp was right..

i was just escaping and not moving on..
it is hard..i just cant bear the thought of forgetting everything that has happened even though..it seems to be like a dream to me..a long one..a dream that lasted for 2 years..

is there a promise between us..
i bet you have forgotten it..
that's why i told gp that maybe there is maybe there isnt..

i think gp knows what is going on..the only person..maybe yx too..
i m sorry that i cant tell u guys anything yet..
because i m confused..
i dunno how i have gone through this 6 months..

but i know i have to settle it soon..because i m going crazy soon..
missing you although i know u wont..
i cant control myself that well anymore..

but i need to..i have to make this over..
i don't wish to break the promise i made to my dear friends..

but i keep having this small hope somewhere in my stupid heart that maybe you will be back..
silly..
stubborn..

maybe it is really stubborn huh..haha